A Hope and a Future - by Cecilia York

My husband, Kelvin, and I had been married for two years when we thought it time for us to have a family. However, it wasn’t turning out the way we wanted. The doctor told us that it wouldn’t be possible for me to get pregnant. That was horrible news; we love children and we had a strong desire to become parents. We knew that everything is possible to God, no matter what the doctors think. So, we prayed and cried out to God, “Please, Lord, bless us with a baby!” But as the years went by with no answers from God, we thought maybe it wasn’t for us. During that time, Kelvin worked at St. Luke’s Hospital in the evening shift as a Patient Care Technician. While he worked, I prayed and cried to God, asking Him, “Lord, where are you?” Then one night I realized that I was asking God for a blessing when He wasn’t willing for that blessing to happen yet. So I asked God what He wanted me to do. In my thoughts came the word: FORGIVENESS.

I grew up in a dysfunctional family, which was not easy for me. My father left us when I was a baby, so my mother took all her frustrations out on me. My older sister followed my mother’s attitude towards me. I always thought I deserved it, because I was too ugly, worthless, good for nothing, and wasn’t worth anything to anyone. The Lord reminded me that I was carrying a heavy load of pain and resentment against my family. That night I changed the way I prayed, “Lord, help me to forgive them, help me to forget my past!!” Every night I spent time with God, I cried with so much pain inside of me, “Heal me Lord, this is too painful!!” One night I was pleading to God for His divine help, when all of a sudden I felt His presence around me, and peace fell over me. I stopped crying and felt better. I knew that my Lord healed me that night; finally I felt joy in me. A few days after that, my sister called me for the first time in many years and invited us over for Christmas. I accepted the invitation very happily, and knew that God was doing something on purpose. That Christmas was the best Christmas ever; for the first time we asked each other for forgiveness, and felt love around us. I thanked God for preparing my heart. I was free of resentment, and instead my heart was full of forgiveness. After we got home that day, there was a peace and love around Kelvin and I.

Around January, Kelvin came home from work with tears in his eyes. When I asked what happened, he told me to get ready; you will be a mom very soon. What?! He was taking care of this patient who had been unconscious for three days, but one night he just sat up and said, “Kelvin, you have a beautiful son! He’s standing next to you.” Kelvin was stunned, how did the man know his name in the first place? How could he have woken up, said those words, and then just go back to sleep? The man’s wife was a witness to this. She told Kelvin that he had better believe it, because her husband loves the Lord strongly and was a deacon at his church. We finally had hope again that God was going to bless us with a baby.

In March around my birthday, I took a pregnancy test and it was positive. We told ourselves not to get too excited until we saw the doctor, but it was very hard not to be excited. That night when I finally fell asleep, I had a beautiful dream. I asked, “Jesus, is this you?” He said, “You are pregnant, and it is a boy.” I told Him in my dream thank you, thank you. He said, “But I want you to do something.” He said, “Follow me,” and took me to Noah’s ark; inside of it were the 12 apostles preaching to people. He said, “I want you to help him to become just like them.” In my dream I told Him, “I promise to you Jesus, I promise.” I woke up, and after telling Kelvin, we both knew that I was pregnant and it was going to be a baby boy. The next day, the doctor told us, you are very pregnant, but don’t tell anybody yet, because at your age we don’t know if this is going to happen or not. But nothing is impossible for God; I was 39 years old and pregnant. As soon as we left the doctor’s office we told friends and family the good news. After 10 years of waiting, God blessed us with a beautiful, healthy boy, because it was in God’s timing, not ours.

Since I became a Christian, I’ve loved Jeremiah 29:11-13. It reminds me that my Lord has given me so much in my life. He has given me hope and a great future. “‘For I know the thoughts I think toward you,’ says the Lord. ‘Thoughts of peace and not evil, to give you future and hope. Then you’ll call upon Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart.’”.

Cecilia York